Lesbian officer gets VIP seat for Obama speech - Air Force News | News from Afghanistan & Iraq - Air Force Times

Lesbian officer gets VIP seat for Obama speech

When “don’t ask, don’t tell” was repealed Sept. 20, Col. Ginger Wallace thought it would mean she’d finally get to recognize the silent sacrifice of her partner in front of her colleagues and military friends.

The Air Force intelligence officer never dreamed it would get her an invitation to sit with first lady Michelle Obama and Jill Biden at President Obama’s State of the Union address at the Capitol.

But that’s where she was Tuesday, while her partner of more than a decade, Kathy Knopf, watched from the White House.

In December, Knopf got to participate in Wallace’s promotion ceremony, apparently the first reporting of such an event following the repeal of the policy that kept gay and lesbian service members from serving openly.

Knopf said she and Wallace are still trying to take it all in.

“We’re normal people. This can’t be happening to us,” Knopf said of all the attention. “It’s just been an amazing couple of months.”

Knopf, who is an intelligence analyst, said participating in the Wallace’s promotion ceremony was a treat for her after years of living in fear that she might say or do something that would have ended Wallace’s career.

“All the military people that were there were so nice,” she said of the promotion ceremony. “They all made a point of congratulating me, as well. And that meant a lot, to be recognized. We are really just lucky.”

Wallace said it meant a lot to have Knopf seated where any other spouse or significant other would sit during a promotion ceremony. ”It’s one thing for the service member to live under ‘don’t ask, don’t tell,’ but it’s another thing for the partners and families,” she said. “They go on this journey with you.”

Wallace said she and Knopf were honored to represent men and women who currently serve and their families, and also those who have served but were forced out under the previous rules.

“It was such an honor to be there … to represent the thousands of gays and lesbians that serve, have served and will serve,” she said.

Ty Walrod, the co-director of OutServe, an association of active-duty gay and lesbian military personnel that launched in July 2010, said Wallace’s presence was a recognition of not only Wallace’s distinguished service to her country and Knopf’s support, but also of all gay and lesbian service members who can now be honest about their lives.

“The repeal of DADT is a groundbreaking accomplishment on the path to equality of all Americans,” Walrod said in a news release. “We look forward to continued progress, which includes marriage equality for all Americans, including those families serving selflessly to support and defend our nation.”

In addition to sitting with the first lady, Wallace said a highlight was meeting President Obama and thanking him for his leadership in ending the policy. She admits she was a little awestruck and sure she didn’t say what she had rehearsed.

“It’s difficult when you finally face someone who had such a positive impact on your life,” she said.

Wallace said the repeal of “don’t ask, don’t tell” fundamentally changed the quality of life for thousands of military members who had to keep their sexual orientation a secret to keep their jobs and serve their country.

Knopf said it was scary the first time Wallace deployed. But attempting to access the support systems that traditional military spouses and families tend to have would have been a career-killer for Wallace. Now, she doesn’t have to worry as much about that as Wallace heads to Afghanistan.

“It’s nice to feel less alone,” she said.

Wallace said there is still work to do to allow the partners of gay and lesbian service members access to benefits. The Defense of Marriage Act prevents the federal government from offering spousal benefits to same-sex couples. But she has faith in what the Defense Department can do.

“I know that we’re looking at what the next steps are. I feel confident [that] as the leaders of Department of Defense look at it, they will be out front as much as they can,” Wallace said.